Daughter of Eomer
by Tolwyn
Summary: Elfwine the Fair became king after Eomer, but what about the rest of the family? Character background.
1. Innocent Childhood

((author's note: This is the background story to my character Tolwyn that I have used in many roleplaying games and such... this was formed after only a few months of RP-ing, during the summer of 2003, and finished a year later on my own 15th birthday. I've made it have many parallels to my own life... but hope you enjoy.))

((note on this chapter: first written summer 03, not extremely good/detailed writing, but necessary. Read on :-D))

In the year 3021, the last year of the Third Age, King Eomer of Rohan was wed to Lothiriel, daughter of Imrahil of Dol Amroth. The wedding took place in the Golden Hall on a cold November day; and the King and his Lady were overjoyed, for they loved each other very much.

When two years had passed, Lothiriel gave birth to a son, Elfwine. He is the only son of the King, and thus the heir to the throne. He was born on March 1st, and grew up to be a fair-haired and strong young man, much like his father.

When Elfwine was only a lad of three, his mother bore Eomer a daughter. The girl was born on a warm and peaceful summer night, on the 25th day of June. Her shrill crying that night was said to have "awoken all the inhabitants of the Golden Hall"; thus she was jokingly named Tolwyn, an island of strife amidst an ocean of peace and joy.

These two children of Eomer lived a happy childhood together, enjoying all the privileges of a royal life. Their father was often away, for though the Dark Lord Sauron had fallen in the War, His servants had not. When Eomer _was_ at the Golden Hall, he had a sad aura about him. Having witnessed the death of his uncle and cousin in the War of the Ring seemed to have aged him.

Therefore, Tolwyn and Elfwine were close to their mother. She nurtured them, played with them, taught them about life. For five years they lived together in bliss; Elfwine and his sister experienced an innocent childhood in Meduseld.

But when Elfwine was eight years old, his father started taking him on missions; "training" was what the King called it. Elfwine went with the Riders on Uruk-hai hunting quests. He saw more bloodshed than a boy his age should see. Lothiriel secretly disagreed with this; but she loved the King, and trusted that only the best training was being given to their son.

Tolwyn loved her brother dearly, and did not want him to go; yet he explained gently to her, "I must go, Tolwyn… I must. It might make Father happy." So go he did, though it did not seem to make the King any more joyful. When Elfwine returned after his first few days of "training", Tolwyn (then 5 years old) ran out to hug him, and tell him about her day. But he seemed lifeless, emotionless; he was wearied by the slaughter he saw. He walked right past her, his eyes unseeing, his mind in another world. She looked at his back as he walked away, her big green eyes filling up with tears… she was soon picked up and hugged by her mother, and put to bed.

From then on, Tolwyn and her mother were very close. Since Tolwyn hadn't started lessons yet, her mother would walk around Edoras with her. The townspeople would gather around, gazing at the two royal ladies: The Queen Lothiriel in her beautiful robes, walking with the solemn glory of her race; and the young Lady Tolwyn, grinning only like a little girl can, running around in a simple playdress. For the next three years Tolwyn and her mother lived at Meduseld, while Eomer and Elfwine were frequently out on missions.


	2. Early Learning

When Tolwyn was eight years of age, she started taking lessons. She had to wear elegant dresses that she couldn't play in; she had to sit all day in a stuffy room, and listen to the lesson-master drone on and on in his boring voice. Eomer wanted his children to be the first Eorlingas to read and write, for the rest of Rohan sang about their history. Tolwyn didn't get along with or obey the lesson-master. Because of this, she snuck out on the first day of lessons, and played in the streets of Edoras. She eventually came home a few hours later, her beautiful dress torn and muddy. She was brought to the throne room by a royal guard. Elfwine sat silently and solemnly in his chair next to the throne; for, after three years of watching death after death, he was as stern and quiet as his father. Her father and lesson-master scolded her harshly, and thought she should be punished.

But the Queen looked lovingly upon her daughter, and smiled warmly at her. Lothiriel had a short, whispered discussion with Eomer; and, using all her womanly charm, she persuaded the reluctant King not to punish Tolwyn. This happened nearly every week for two years; Tolwyn would escape the school-room, and run about in the streets of Edoras. She would be caught, brought to Meduseld, and nearly punished. But her mother would save her from punishment.

When she was nearly 10, Tolwyn cut her hair, and put on her brother's old clothes- and when she escaped lessons she played in Edoras as a boy. That day, the guards couldn't find her for hours, until she returned to the Golden Hall by herself. Both the King and Queen frowned at her, but it made her brother laugh, something he hadn't done in awhile. She was sent to bed without supper that night, but her mother brought her a piece of bread, and comforted her, for she was crying. That summer when her cousins from Ithilien came to visit, they laughed at her short hair and teased her. But Elfwine defended her fiercely, and soon their cousins were sent to the healing rooms with bloody noses.

Despite the fact that Tolwyn was constantly running away from lessons, she learned what she needed to during those years, and was ready to learn more.


	3. A Tragic Death

By the time she was 10, Tolwyn was a vibrant and active young girl, very stubborn and adventurous. She had sparkling green eyes and golden hair, and when she was happy she would grin in the most carefree way.

But in the coldness of January of 3038, the Queen got sick, and was bed-ridden. Tolwyn would still run away from lessons. But when she was caught, she was punished and sent to bed without supper, for her mother wasn't there to intervene for her and protect her. Lothiriel's condition got worse and worse; by the middle of March, the King Elessar had come to Edoras, to try healing her. It didn't work; the King went back to Minas Tirith and Lothiriel was still sick.

On March 17th, the doctors and healers had begun to talk amongst themselves, and they told King Eomer what they knew and how likely it was that Lothiriel would die. Eomer was silent- he sat motionless on his throne the rest of the day, and was not himself. Tolwyn ran away from lessons again, and when she was captured and brought before the King, he only waved his hand and mumbled "Guards, the usual punishment for her." Eomer did not even look at Tolwyn.

So Tolwyn was sent to her room. Through a window there she watched the sun set, and eventually laid down and fell asleep, her stomach growling in protest. But she was troubled by nightmares that night, something that had never happened before. They were horrible nightmares too, of massive bloodshed and of those she loved dying. She awoke startled, and began to cry. She decided to go to her mother for comfort- and also, she had seen the healers talking, and wanted to know what was happening.

So, bare-footed and in her nightdress, she snuck down the hallway to the healing room. She soon reached it, and went in. Although her footsteps were quiet, the Queen soon woke up, coughing. Tolwyn said quietly, "Mother, I had a nightmare, and- it was awful. And I saw the healers talking too… are you going to be well soon?" Lothiriel replied, "My dear daughter, come and stand by the bedside, and we shall talk." Tolwyn crept over and stood next to the bed, and looked expectantly at her mother. Lothiriel said solemnly, "Tolwyn, I will be taking a journey soon… a long journey, and I shall not come back."

Tolwyn suddenly looked excited as she asked, "Are you going to Ithilien? To Dol Amroth? I want to see the ocean! May I come, mother, may I?"

Lothiriel started to laugh, and the laughing turned to coughing. After the coughing fit was over she explained to Tolwyn, "No, dear, you cannot come. No one can… I am going alone."

Tolwyn started to cry again. She asked, "But when will I see you again? Why can't you just stay here?"

"I cannot stay, it's just impossible, dear- but you will see me again, after you have grown up to be the beautiful young woman I know you'll be, and after you have died. Right now, let us spend as much time together as we can, for I feel I am leaving soon…"

The night was frigid, and by that time Tolwyn was trembling, her tears falling silently to the cold stone floor. Lothiriel said lovingly, "Oh, you're shivering! Come here, and lay under the quilts, and go to sleep. Your nightmares are gone now, don't worry…" Tolwyn slowly climbed onto the soft bed, and buried herself under the many warm quilts. She started to sob quietly on her mother's shoulder, as her mother held her and comforted her. After a few minutes, Lothiriel said, "Sleep now, morning will come before you know it." She paused, and then whispered, "My dear daughter."

Lothiriel held her daughter until Tolwyn drifted into a peaceful sleep. She then slowly took off a necklace that around her neck, and placed it around her daughter's neck. She was careful to hide it under Tolwyn's nightdress, so whatever healer came in the morning would not see it. Tolwyn didn't know what journey her mother was talking about, so she slept calmly, curled up by her mother's side, her small hand held by her mother's graceful one. Lothiriel also drifted into sleep, never to wake again. The last thing she gazed upon in life was her daughter's innocent face.

The Queen of Rohan died peacefully that night in her sleep, a solemn and beautiful expression on her face. Her features had the same appearance in death as they had in life- graceful and noble. Tolwyn woke up the next morning, and squeezed her mother's hand, saying, "Mother, mother, wake up, it is morning-" but Lothiriel's hand was pale and cold, her eyes sealed closed with death. The healers and doctors came in and pulled her away from her beloved mother, kicking and screaming and sobbing uncontrollably all at the same time. She was handed over to her mother's servants, who dressed her and did her hair. Tolwyn was now silent, emotionless, her face blank- they dressed her in black.

Tolwyn was led to the throne room, and sat beside her brother; they both sat on the steps next to her father's throne. Elfwine was wearing black also, and crying. Tolwyn could not believe it; her brother had never cried before. She silently tapped him on the arm and looked into his eyes, and then she started crying too. They both sat on the steps and sobbed, holding each other. But they both wiped their tears and looked up as Lothiriel's funeral bier was carried in.

The Queen was dressed in rich, royal purple robes, her crown on her head and her hands folded upon her chest. Everyone was silent as her bier was carried in and laid in the middle of the throne room. There were candles around her lifeless body, casting flickering shadows on the wall, for the morning sunlight was shut out of that mournful room. Tolwyn looked up hopefully at her father, seeking comfort in some loving gaze- but he instead frowned at her, and glared. In some insane, jealous part of his mind, Eomer thought Tolwyn had in a way killed Lothiriel, for Tolwyn was the last to see her alive. Tolwyn turned and sobbed into her brother's shoulder, thinking sadly, _she is gone, gone forever, now no one will comfort me, no one will save me, no one will love me…_

Elfwine had suddenly realized as he held his sister that Lothiriel was the only one that had made Tolwyn feel loved, the only person that really cared for her. He vowed that from that day on he would love her and comfort her, and be her caretaker and teacher. So he held Tolwyn, patting her back and letting her cry on his shoulder. Just as Tolwyn was thinking that no one would comfort her anymore, she stopped crying, for she had noticed that Elfwine was there, holding her. She held him at arms' length and asked quietly, "Why do you comfort me now? You never have before."

Elfwine answered sullenly, "Our mother has never died before…" He took a deep breath, wiped his eyes, and continued, "We must stay together now, for Father has lost the one he loves most. He barely knows you, he is only training me, he loves neither one of us as he should…" Elfwine put an arm around Tolwyn, and she started weeping again. He whispered to her, "From now on I will care for you, my sister, and if you cry it will be on my shoulder, and if you learn it will be from my teachings- I will love you, and protect you, Tolwyn, as mother loved both of us…" Elfwine then stopped, and looked at Lothiriel and began crying silently.

So it happened that the Queen Lothiriel died on the night of March 17th, 3038, and was buried among the mounds of simbelmyne outside the gates of Edoras.


	4. Despair and Changes

For one day, Tolwyn was allowed to run. She easily escaped her lessons and ran to the stables, and climbed into the hayloft. She sobbed quietly, the smell of hay and of horses comforting her. She stayed in the hayloft for hours, crying. Finally she walked back to the Golden Hall and was sent to bed. That one day, and that day only, she was allowed freedom.

When Tolwyn woke the next morning, the servants came in and took care of her, and she was rushed to the kitchen for breakfast. In the hallways she heard the servants whispering among themselves. She only heard a few bits of conversation, which sounded thus: "A new lessons-room… no windows… she won't be let outside… he's trying to protect her…"

The truth was, Eomer thought the sickness Lothiriel had gotten was from the commoners. His mother died when he was very young, his sister had been badly wounded in the War, and his wife had died. His grief and despair over losing Lothiriel, the one true love in life he had ever had, were too much for words to explain. He did not want to lose his only daughter now. So he was going to keep her away from all harm.

After breakfast, Tolwyn was sent to her new lessons-room. It had no windows, and only one door that was guarded by two soldiers. The only things lighting the room were a few torches and candles. She sat down in an uncomfortable wooden chair, and the lessons-master began to teach. Tolwyn was in the new lessons-room all day, learning. After they were finally done, she was given a small supper and sent to bed.

This went on for some years. Tolwyn began to grow thin and pale. Her once sparkling and happy green eyes now had tints of grey, and her once-golden hair that was bleached by the warm sunlight was getting streaks of brown in it. She never smiled, never laughed. Her father and brother were kept busy fighting, and they barely noticed her. They were often away, and her brother could not keep the promise he had made to her the day their mother died.

When Tolwyn was 13 years old, she had an overwhelming urge to escape. So, on the night of March 17th, 3041, she dressed in her brother's old clothes and climbed out her window, and ran. She ran half-blind, stumbling often, tears streaming down her face. Finally she exited the gates of Edoras, and found her mother's grave.

Tolwyn collapsed onto Lothiriel's grave and began sobbing. Her mother had been gone three years, and Tolwyn missed her. She had died just when Tolwyn needed her most. After awhile Tolwyn stopped weeping, and placed a simbelmyne bloom on Lothiriel's grave as a sign of respect. She then made her way back to the Golden Hall, reached her room, and managed to get a few hours of sleep before being woken up the next morning.

Tolwyn kept sneaking out every night. She loved just being able to run through the fields and to breathe the crisp midnight air. She would often fall asleep during lessons, but despite this, she learned quickly everything the lessons-master had to teach her.

A few weeks after Tolwyn first snuck out, Eomer led Elfwine and her to the royal stables. He took them to the stall of a Meara mare that had bred with the king's own steed. Lying near the mare were two colts that looked only a few days old. One was pure white with a creamy white mane and tail, and the other was an ordinary brown color with a flat black mane and tail.

"Someday, these Mearas will be yours," Eomer explained. "You are the descendants of the kings of Rohan, therefore you and only you can ride the Mearas." Eomer then told them the whole history of the Mearas, starting with Felarof, the steed of Eorl.

When Elfwine and Tolwyn were nearly asleep from being so bored, Eomer finally ended the tale of Shadowfax. Then he said, "The name of the white colt is Aldor. Elfwine, he shall be yours on your 18th birthday." Elfwine looked delighted, and peeked back in the stall again at the white colt.

"And what about me?" Tolwyn asked her father quietly. Eomer was just then called back to Meduseld on urgent business, so he said over his shoulder as he strode away, "The brown colt's name is Baldor, you will receive him on your 15th birthday." Eomer then rushed back to the Golden Hall, Elfwine following him.

Tolwyn looked back at the Mearas. "Baldor," she mused to herself. She remembered the story of the human prince Baldor… "…_Baldor, son of Brego, passed the Door and was never seen among men again. A rash vow he spoke, as he drained the horn at that feast which Brego made to hallow new-built Meduseld, and he never came again to the high seat of which he was the heir."_

So Aldor, son of Brego, became the king, while his brother Baldor ran away and was never seen again… Tolwyn was brought out of her daydreaming by a cough from her lessons-master. She reluctantly followed him back to the dark lessons-room, and continued learning.


	5. Realizing a Dream

One night, not long before Tolwyn's fourteenth birthday, she snuck out as usual to visit her mother's grave. She put on Elfwine's old breeches and shirt, and ran through the streets of Edoras. Eventually she made her way outside the gates and into the fields, where she ran unhindered through the tall grass. But something made her stop running after a few minutes. She felt she was being watched by someone…

Tolwyn turned around, facing towards the city. She squinted, her greyish-green eyes searching the shadows beneath the high walls. She couldn't see any movement, nothing was unusual. She was about to go back, when suddenly someone put a hand on her shoulder and another on her mouth. She started to scream, only to find her scream muffled. A familiar voice chuckled behind her and said, "Calm down, sister, 'tis only me." Tolwyn whirled around to see Elfwine standing there, grinning.

"I thought some of my clothes were missing," he said, "But I never would have suspected you to be the thief." His voice took on a more serious tone as he said, "How long have you been coming out here, Tolwyn?" Tolwyn sighed. As long as there was no one there but her and her brother, she might as well tell the truth. "At least three months have passed since the night I first came here," Tolwyn told him. Elfwine, now seventeen years old, was no longer a boy. He was now tall, and strong after the many years of fighting and training he had done. His voice was smooth now and almost as deep as Eomer's. But he could still act immature at times, and he was far from being prepared to be king.

Now, Elfwine looked around them and at the city walls, suspicious. "We are not safe in the open fields. Someone might see us," he whispered. With that, he took Tolwyn's hand and led her back into the city, and up the path towards Meduseld. "Where are we going?" Tolwyn whispered to him. "You'll see," was his quiet reply.

Elfwine led her off the main path, and in a while they ended up in an alley between the royal stables and the armory. Elfwine motioned for her to sit on a nearby bench, and she did. He kneeled in front of her, and took both her hands in his.

"I've seen how you've changed," he began. "Since our mother died-"

"That has nothing to do with it!" Tolwyn hissed. But Elfwine calmed her and spoke again. "Yes it does! Father was worried about you, he kept you protected. He's already lost the most important woman in his life. He doesn't want to lose you, too." Tolwyn frowned, her grey eyes showing her sadness. She just now realized this. Elfwine looked up at her, into her eyes. "I've seen how you never smile anymore. How your eyes have gone from a bright, joyous green to a despairing grey. I want to make you happy again, Tolwyn."

Tolwyn looked away from her brother's eyes- towards the armory. Then she turned her gaze to where the Riders slept, then to the stables. She sighed- it had always been a secret dream of hers to learn how to ride, and fight. Elfwine squeezed her hands gently, making her look back at him. He was grinning, and said, "And I also see all the battle-lust and desire of glory in your eyes- the same look in Father's when he fights." Elfwine glanced at the armory and stable again, and his grin grew broader. "I want to make you happy… and I think I know just how…"


	6. A Different Kind of Lesson

The next day was Tolwyn's 14th birthday. There was no celebration, no presents; there hadn't been for the past few years, since Lothiriel died. Eomer and Elfwine had left with the Riders to go help Gondor pursue Orcs. So after she had woken, got dressed and eaten, Tolwyn went to the lessons-room as usual. She was yawning, still only half-awake, for she had stayed out very late last night. What had happened was Elfwine had taken a standard-issue sword from the armory. He had shown it to her, and asked her if she wanted to learn to use it. She eagerly said yes, and was taught the very basics of the sword- how to hold it, how to stand. Next, he had taken his own bow and quiver out and taught Tolwyn about archery for a short time. By the time all this was done, it was far past midnight. Elfwine promised Tolwyn more "lessons" if she would meet him at night. He even promised to teach her how to ride a Meara. (Elfwine himself was being taught, but being with the Riders since he was 8, knew a lot already.)

When Tolwyn reached the lessons-room and sat down, she was surprised to see that there were no books. The lessons-master wasn't even there. Instead, the minstrel's daughter (a girl a few years older than Tolwyn by the name of Reodwyn) came in. She explained to Tolwyn that the lessons she had been taking before were over, that Tolwyn had learned all there was to learn about the adding of numbers, the history of Middle-Earth and its inhabitants, how to read well and write with a neat hand. That now, Tolwyn was to learn how to draw, how to sing (hence the minstrel), how to sew, how to heal. Tolwyn was lead to the throne room and sat on the steps near the throne with the minstrel. The only other people there were a few guards at the other end of the room. Tolwyn was now in a good mood- no more stuffy, dark lessons-room for her! She doubted she could run away though, for this was not just sitting and listening- these lessons were ones where she had to do something, like sing or sew.

The minstrel pulled out a flute-like instrument and played a note, then asked Tolwyn to sing the note. Tolwyn, who had not sang all her life, failed miserably at this. So the minstrel started at the beginning, teaching Tolwyn about notes and chords, meter and time, sharps and flats. Then suddenly, when Tolwyn was eager to learn more, the minstrel announced the lesson was over.

The minstrel led Tolwyn to the healing room of the Golden Hall. It was fairly small, with cabinets full of herbs shoved against the walls and vials of medicine sitting on a table. There was one window, facing east; and opposite the window, with its headboard against the west wall, was a small bed. It was the same bed, the same room where her mother died.

Tolwyn still had her mother's necklace. She had found it around her neck the morning after Lothiriel died and hadn't taken it off since. No one knew about it, not even her father and brother. She took good care of it, cleaning it till the gold and emeralds and diamonds shined. For the necklace was a simple pendant on a gold chain- the pendant, a tiny diamond horse surrounded by emeralds. It was the banner of Rohan- yet she always wore it under her dress. It was the only reminder she had of her mother.

The healer that was going to teach her was a man in his late 50's, nearly bald and very slow. The lesson seemed to last forever. The old man reminded Tolwyn of her former lesson master, boring with a monotonous voice. But it wasn't so bad, for he showed Tolwyn a few leaves and herbs. He explained everything about them, where they grew, their names, and what they healed. By the time he had explained almost 3 herbs, the lesson was over.

After a small meal, the other lessons- sewing and drawing- began. They did not interest Tolwyn much. She was not that good at either of them, and didn't want to learn either. But these two lessons were the ones that she went outside for. In sewing, she was taken to the market to look at fabrics, and in drawing, she was taken to a garden and told to draw a flower.


	7. Growing into a Lady

Over the course of the year, Tolwyn learned all that was taught to her. Besides learning about music and sewing and the healing arts by day, she would learn riding and fighting at night. She grew almost as tall as her brother, and was still slender, although she started to get a little muscular from her nightly lessons. Instead of a girl, she grew into a woman- or almost a woman. The boys she had known and played in the streets with when she escaped lessons long ago had become Riders in training. The dresses she would wear were graceful, flowing silk, and they had lower necklines and a tighter fit. She looked almost like her mother, some would say. The Royal Guard, the Riders of Rohan, even common men would sometimes give her looks that made her uncomfortable. She would stroll the streets sometimes for lessons, to buy fabric or find herbs or choose something to draw. When she passed, people would bow and call her "Lady Tolwyn".

By the middle of autumn, Tolwyn could block and parry with a sword, trot on a saddled horse, and shoot at a stationary target. By the beginning of winter, she could swordfight clumsily, like a young boy, ride full gallop like a Rider, and shoot quickly at moving targets. By winter she had drawn a picture of her brother, sewn a banner for the throne room, learned how to heal common ailments, and sang the ancient song of Eorl perfectly. When Elfwine turned 18 years old and was given his Meara, he had Tolwyn try to mount it. She was unsuccessful and covered with bruises the next day. But a week later she had mounted, and even rode for a few minutes bareback.

Tolwyn was much happier than she had been. She didn't have to sit in a dark room- she was outside whenever her lessons allowed it. Her hair began to get golden from the sun. Her eyes, which had become completely grey, gradually got specks of bright green that showed through when she smiled. She would sometimes talk to the merchants or washerwomen or even the children in the street. She came to know her people, the Eorlingas. But still, she knew there was more to life than the city of Edoras. She had studied Middle-Earth in her earlier lessons. There were great thick forests, and dark lands and white cities, and the ocean. Her mother came from Dol Amroth, the city by the sea. She often wanted to go visit there, and wondered about her relatives that lived there.

Outside the city walls she had never left, there were many great glorious peoples. There were the heroic Hobbits to the northwest, the Dwarves to the northeast, and the Elves. Tolwyn had always wanted to see an Elf. Her father and brother told her about them, solemn and wise and nearly perfect. She had never seen the King of Gondor's Elven wife and his children, though she had heard plenty about them. Even though she was outside and walking about nearly every day, she still wanted to explore the world that wasn't Rohan, the places that she had only heard about.


	8. The Birthday Party

Tolwyn's fourteenth year passed quickly. Before she knew it, her lessons were near completion and her 15th birthday was approaching. She wasn't told what was going to happen to her after her birthday; she just assumed she would live at the Golden Hall like her aunt Eowyn had done.

June 25th arrived, sunny and bright. Tolwyn dressed in a creamy white dress that was her aunt's that had been saved just for that day. Her father and brother were home, and after a small breakfast she joined them in the throne room. They both stood and bowed to her as if she were a lady now. Then they walked forward until her father was on her left side and her brother on her right. They each offered her an arm, and she linked elbows with them. Together they strolled out the doors and stood in front of the Golden Hall. A small crowd of townspeople that had gathered there cheered before going off to their morning chores again. Eomer took the lead and after unhooking arm with Tolwyn he began to walk. Elfwine and Tolwyn, still arm-in-arm, followed their father to the royal stables. He led them to a stall near the end of the stable, where Baldor the Meara was standing.

"As you were promised, my daughter," Eomer said. "It is your 15th birthday, and Baldor is yours." Tolwyn smiled and politely hugged her father. From her brother's lessons she knew how to ride the temperamental Mearas and how to care for them. The difference between the ancient breed of Mearas and regular horses is that Mearas understand the speech of Men. She let Baldor sniff her outstretched hand, then petted him. He was a full-grown stallion now, but still only a little bigger than a normal horse. Except for the near-human look in his eyes, Baldor looked like any normal dumb horse.

The three nobles strolled together around the city for a while. Eomer and Elfwine talked about battle and politics; Tolwyn, feeling awkward, stayed quiet. The day passed eventually, and at sundown there was a feast at the Golden Hall. Every noble person in Edoras was invited, and there was enough food to feed 10 whole villages for a month. Tolwyn ate enough to fill her, then sat quietly at the table and watched as everyone talked and laughed. She knew she should be celebrating; but somehow she felt uneasy about her future, that something was going to happen soon to change her life forever.

In the evening, after most of the court nobles had been dismissed, Tolwyn met her father and brother in a small study. Her father who had his back turned toward her as she stood in the doorway said, "I have something to give you, Tolwyn. It was my mother's, and your great-grandfather King Thengel's before her. I doubt you will have use for it in this age of peace, but still, take care of it." With that he turned around and presented to her a dagger. At least, he called it a dagger. It was as big as any small-sword and quite sharp. It had two emeralds and two diamonds embedded in the cross-guard and three galloping horses engraved on the blade. The horses got smaller as they got to the tip of the blade, and the "line" they were running on was wavy as if it were the hills of Rohan.

"It's beautiful," she breathed as she took it from her father. "Oh, thank you! I will treasure it forever!" She threw her arms around his neck (making sure not to cut his ear off, of course) and hugged him. Elfwine watched this all with an approving smile. He had not seen his father and sister this close since she was a baby. A servant came on his order and took the dagger in its plain black scabbard to Tolwyn's chambers. The three of them sat in chairs near a roaring fireplace and began to talk. The conversation was trivial matters such as the weather until…

Eomer turned to Tolwyn with a strange look in his eye. "Tolwyn, dearest daughter, would you like to travel now that all your lessons are over?" She nodded eagerly. Elfwine, again silent, raised an eyebrow at this. He knew Eomer did not want to take any risk of Tolwyn being hurt, and travel involved many risks. But he stayed silent. Eomer sat in thought for a few seconds more, then asked, "Have you ever heard of Eldarion?" Tolwyn searched her memory for a minute then responded, "He's the son of King Elessar, isn't he? The Prince of Gondor?" Eomer nodded. "Oft has he ridden into battle with his father and Elfwine and I. He is brave and strong, and a gentleman as far as I know. And," he paused and glanced at Tolwyn, "He is in need of a wife."


	9. Struggle and Decision

Tolwyn's face went pale and her eyes grew wide and grey. Elfwine stood angrily and practically yelled at Eomer, "Are you arranging a marriage, father?! How could you? She is your only daughter!" Eomer stood also and responded untruthfully, "Well… umm… no! Of course not. It's just that a marriage would be… beneficial to both our kingdoms… and…"

"And what about her? How do you think she feels about her own father sending her away?" Tolwyn, who was silent, had stood and walked to the door while her father and brother fought. They were too busy arguing so they never noticed her as she quietly walked out the door and down a hallway to her room. The last thing she heard was her father yelling at Elfwine, "She is leaving for Minas Tirith tomorrow and that is final!"

The thought of her father marrying her off was devastating for Tolwyn. She walked to her room as gracefully as she could. The guards standing around could hear the arguing, see her walking with her last ounce of dignity. They avoided looking into her eyes and stayed where they were. Tolwyn reached her room, closed the door, and sat on her bed. The moonlight shone through the window, the only light there was, for no candles were yet lit.

Tolwyn thought, tears overflowing in her eyes as she did. She couldn't go; she wouldn't go. But if she hid here, she would be caught- made to go anyway. She looked around her room for some idea on how to get out of the situation. She felt she couldn't live anymore; she wasn't needed by anyone. She never did anything useful at the Golden Hall, at least she couldn't remember doing anything. She had to escape, escape the cage she was in, escape the boundaries of life.

As she looked around the room, Tolwyn's gaze finally fell on one thing in particular, the answer- _the dagger_. It was laying on a small table beside her bed, shining in the moonlight. She took it up with trembling hands and examined it. _Yes, that's the solution,_ she thought. _Just die, leave this world completely. Be reunited with Mother. Not be a burden to anyone, not be caged…_

While thinking, Tolwyn had stood and kneeled on the floor in front of the window. She sat on her knees, and thought of trivial things. Where to stab so she would die the fastest, some way she could not get her aunt's beautiful dress stained. Finally she gave up thinking, too tired to care. Whoever found her could clean up adequately, she hoped.

Tolwyn took off her necklace and held it in her left hand. She studied it. The effect of moonlight on the diamond horse made it look like it was ghostly. She gazed out her window, at the stars. _May my death be swift and painless… and may I see Mother greet me after… _She closed her eyes, a last tear falling, sliding slowly down her cheek. She held her mother's necklace loosely in her left palm, and held the dagger in the other hand. She was shaking all over; the whole ordeal of killing herself was a scary thought, and a terrifying deed. She lifted the dagger above her with a quivering hand, hoped again for a quick death…


	10. Fly Away

The door to her room burst open just as Tolwyn was about to bury the dagger deep in her heart. It was Elfwine, and when he saw her he tried to yell. He was so shocked, nothing but a gasp came out. Tolwyn heard it, her eyes still closed. She dropped the dagger and collapsed on the floor, sobbing.

"Tolwyn!" exclaimed Elfwine, shutting the door behind him. "Tolwyn, what were you doing?" She kept sobbing, her shoulders and torso shaking with each ragged breath. "Please, talk to me..." Elfwine said quietly as he kneeled next to her. After a while, Tolwyn gathered what was left of her strength and will, and pulled herself onto her bed, still sobbing. Elfwine sat by her, unsure of what to do. He awkwardly put an arm around her, and as she had done over five years ago at her mother's funeral, Tolwyn turned and sobbed on her brother's shoulder. He held her hand and let her cry, all the while cursing his father in his mind. A few times she tried to stop and speak to Elfwine, but as soon as she tried emotion would overtake her words and she would go back to weeping.

Finally Tolwyn dried most of her tears and looked up into Elfwine's eyes again. She said simply, "I cannot live with this." Elfwine nodded, waiting for her to say more. "He was only nice to me so I would agree to leave…" she mused tearfully. "He has no love for me, no use for me. I'm only a burden to be done away with."

"He loves you… he just doesn't know it yet," Elfwine replied, trying to be comforting. He hated to see his baby sister treated like this, and by his own father too. He tried to think of something. He would save Tolwyn, even if it meant overthrowing the whole of Rohan. He loved her dearly, with the deepest bond a brother and sister could have.

"I'm trapped, Elfwine," she whispered hoarsely after a few minutes of just sitting there. "Caged like a wild bird that can't fly away…" Tolwyn suddenly got up and retrieved her mother's necklace that was lying on the floor. She stood and looked out the window again, not knowing what to do. Elfwine glanced at her, then at the dagger, still on the floor, and suddenly he had an idea.

"Run away disguised!" he whispered excitedly to her. Tolwyn turned around and looked at him, a confused expression on her face. "Disguised? As what?" "A Rider! You can borrow an extra helm and a breastplate, and you already have a horse and sword. Go, tonight," he said. "Go where?" she asked. "There's naught but villages around here, they would recognize me, even in a disguise."

"Go to-" Elfwine started to say, but then there was a knock on the door. "Lady Tolwyn? Are you alright?" asked a guard. "Yes, she's fine!" called Elfwine. "She's just… uh… packing for the trip! She called me in to help her." They heard running footsteps coming from the throne room, each step landing lightly on the hallway floor. Then they heard a faint whispering, then, "Master Elfwine, you have been summoned to join the King in the throne room. He orders that you be there immediately."

"I hate when they tell me he's the King. He's my father, not some remote stranger," Elfwine whispered randomly. Then he made his way to the door without a word. He thought Tolwyn would be all right, that she would somehow make it without any guidance. He was utterly wrong.


	11. The Minas Tirith Experience

Tolwyn changed into her brother's old clothes one last time, putting her necklace on underneath. She put on a belt and attached the dagger scabbard to it, and sheathed the dagger. She managed to climb out her window, but while descending the wall she fell near the ground. She got up, bruised, and snuck to the armory. She put on a small breastplate, and then chose a helm. She twisted her long, golden brown hair up and put the helm on top of it. Her hair stayed in, and the helm was tight enough to not fall. She made her way quickly to the stables and saddled Baldor. The horse was not familiar with her yet, and fussed and made trouble as she put the bridle and other tack on him.

Finally she was as ready as she'd ever be and led him out of the stable. She chose a small dirt path hidden from the main road and followed it to the gates. She snuck out into the fields and, after a few unsuccessful attempts at mounting Baldor, got on him and looked around. Her brother never told her where to go. An idea popped into her head- _go to Minas Tirith_. Of course! That is where they were sending her off to; they would never expect her to go there on her own. So she turned Baldor straight east, whispered in his ear _"To the white city, and hurry!"_ and he did not do a thing. She clicked her tongue softly, whispered the same thing louder, and still the horse did not move. She tried whispering in Rohirric, still the stubborn creature did not move. Finally she kicked him in the sides, and with that he reared up a moment then galloped off east.

The journey took only a few days on the Meara. Baldor was swift, when Tolwyn could get him to move. He was a stubborn, wild horse, and Tolwyn got thrown off his back a couple times. But if Tolwyn was nice to him, letting him graze when he wanted, then he would obey.

The journey to Minas Tirith was also exhausting for Tolwyn. She was not used to strenuous exercise like this. Often she would feel like she was going to faint, or vomit, or both. The weather was hot (it being the end of June) and the terrain was harsh. She got dirty, and bruised, and sometimes scarred. The night when she escaped, she followed the Snowbourn River east, till it joined the Entwash River in the morning. One day after that she was still following the Entwash. By that night she had followed the Entwash almost to the Anduin River. She turned south, and could see Minas Tirith tall and imposing even from that distance. She rode toward it through the night, and stopped in a grove of trees hidden below the outer wall to rest. She tied Baldor up, lay down and fell asleep just as the sun rose in the east.

She awoke later in the day, not feeling any better. She ached all over, in places she didn't know could ache. She was not used to this _at all_. She was used to strolling around Edoras in clean dresses, bathing every night, getting healed when she was hurt. She left Baldor where he was, grazing on the sweet grass, and stumbled to the broken gate. She was recognized as an ally by the guards and let in. She looked around her. Everything was clean white stone and organized streets. She didn't like it, and wished she was back in Edoras. But the thought was soon dismissed as her growling stomach and aching head reminded her of her condition.

She wandered up the street awhile, going slow. Finally she saw a tavern, and went inside. She pulled herself up onto a barstool and ordered a big meal, practically drooling at the thought of it. Then the barkeep asked if she wanted wine. Tolwyn thought, _well, I am away from home… and surely a simple drink won't harm me, especially if no one knows…_ so she ordered a glass of the finest they had. It was brought out before the meal, and she tasted it. At first she made a disgusted expression, for the alcohol made it bitter. But then she took another taste, and found it fruity. A few sips more, and it was refreshing. She eventually downed the whole glass quickly, and her mind became a bit dim.

But soon the food was served, fresh and hot. She ate nearly all of it. She stuffed herself till she could not eat another bite. She sat on the barstool for a while after, digesting. The barkeep kept looking at her, and she could not figure out why. Finally he walked over to her and said, "How will you be paying, sir?"

Tolwyn was taken aback. She had never paid for a meal in her life. She was also confused at being called "sir", because of the effects of the wine, but she finally remembered that she was disguised. She came to her senses, and, seeing the angry barkeep, said "Come back in a minute, while I find some coins." The barkeeper stormed off angrily to another customer. Tolwyn tried to remember where she kept money, and searched for any pockets or pouches on her clothes that she would have put some in. Then she remembered- _she didn't bring money!_

Tolwyn panicked. She couldn't think of anything else to do but _run. _So she got up as quietly as she could, made her way to the door, and ran up the street. It was only a few seconds before she heard a commotion and some curses in the tavern, and running behind her. The running slowed and stopped, and Tolwyn heard the barkeep yell at the gate guards: "Guards! That boy didn't pay! Run! Capture him! Get the thief!" She heard even heavier footfalls behind her, coming closer and closer. _Why did I even do this? Why did I run from Edoras in the first place?_ She wondered desperately to herself as she began to get slower. She was still aching and tired, and had just eaten a huge meal. The alcohol in the wine, too, still affected her a little.

Tolwyn felt herself suddenly pushed down from behind. She was caught now. The guards kicked her once, cursed at her, and even punched her a few times. They picked her up by both arms and turned to the barkeep. "What should we do with him?" they asked. The barkeep, who was not as cold and heartless as he first appeared to Tolwyn, said "He deserves a fair trial, but take him straight to the King!"

Tolwyn's mouth was bleeding from the punches, and she was out of breath from being kicked in the ribs. She couldn't walk, so the two guards dragged her by her arms through the streets. It was a long way to the Citadel of Minas Tirith. Tolwyn groaned and moaned, but the guards ignored her and talked to each other. She could hear what they discussed. As they were nearing the Citadel, the guards began to talk about what they were really going to do with her.

"The King doesn't have time to deal with a pretentious barkeeper's problems," one said. "And no time for dirty little thieves like this one," said the other, shaking Tolwyn's arm a bit. "Who else is there? We have to satisfy that arrogant barkeeper somehow, and we just can't kill the boy." The first guard thought for a few minutes. "What about the Prince?" he said. "He's not busy during these hours. And I'm sure he would love to do something 'kingly'." The second guard thought about it for half a minute, then nodded. Then he turned and looked down at Tolwyn. "Well, it seems you're going to Prince Eldarion now."


	12. Dialogue with a Prince

With that, they arrived at the doors to a building near the Citadel, and Tolwyn was pushed inside. "Here, my Prince," said the first guard. "This boy forgot to pay a barkeep. You can judge him and decide his fate. Don't be too nice to the rotten thief!" the two guards chuckled at themselves and shut the door. The building was some meeting hall, about as big as her father's throne room. But the only other person was a figure on a chair at the end opposite the doorway. The room was shadowy, except for light streaming in some windows near the end of the hall where the figure sat. She stood there, unsure of what to do. She saw the figure stand, and come into a patch of light.

He was almost as tall as her father, with dark hair and blue eyes. He had high cheekbones and a firmly set jaw. He was clean-shaven, unlike her kin, and his ears had barely noticeable points at their tops. _That is Elessar and Arwen's son_, she thought. _Prince Eldarion, who Father wanted me to…_ Her train of thought was interrupted by a low voice saying, "Come here, boy… come into the light." She did as she was told, and stood a few feet away. She stared; he was handsome, and an emotion never felt before stirred in her. But she suppressed it and waited for him to say something else.

"What is your name?" he asked. She became frantic again- she hadn't thought of a name! She thought and thought of some name she could use. Finally she replied, "Dernhelm, sir." Tolwyn, in her madness, forgot that her aunt Eowyn used that same name when she disguised herself long ago. Eldarion, who was as smart as he was handsome, remembered that name. He was suspicious. He knew that the king of Rohan and his own father were trying to arrange something between him and the King's daughter. He had also heard rumors that she had run away in the middle of the night, when she was told about it. He knew he should feel hurt and insulted, but he didn't

"Take off your helm, if you will," he said. Tolwyn shook her head no. "Take off your helm, _please_," he said through gritted teeth. Still, Tolwyn shook her head. He walked closer until his face was only a few inches away from hers, glaring into her eyes. "Remove your helm, _boy,_" he said, putting emphasis on the word boy. He could see the fear in her eyes. They were grey, like the steel of a sword; yet green specks still appeared, the color of spring leaves. She glared back fiercely, her eyes going all grey. "No," she declared, and raised herself up on her tiptoes to try and match his height.

"Then shall I have to punch you?" he retorted. "Shall I have to hurt you for no reason?" Tolwyn, whose mouth was still bleeding, spat out, "I fear neither pain nor death." Again, she forgot that the same was said of her aunt Eowyn to King Elessar long ago. Eldarion stood there, still glaring into her eyes, Tolwyn still glaring back, as if they were trying to stare each other down. Inwardly, Eldarion marveled at this girl. He knew the guards that dragged her up were the meanest of the whole army of Gondor, and she had to have endured a long and painful journey. Here she was, bleeding, bruised, feeling her life was forfeit; and still she would not surrender.

Eldarion pulled his arm back and made a fist, as if he was going to punch her. Tolwyn did as he thought she would do, and cringed and closed her eyes. _Poor girl,_ he thought. _Already beat up beyond reason, thinking I'm going to hurt her more. What a bad first impression she must have of Minas Tirith. I might as well save a lot of time and embarrassment._ In the few seconds after Tolwyn closed her eyes, he grabbed both sides of her helm and lifted it off. She immediately yelped and reached for it, then realized he probably knew who she was. She knelt and looked at the ground, avoiding his eyes.

He smiled when he saw her hair cascade down. He knew it was a daughter of kings. Who else but a child of Eomer could have had such fierce eyes? He even started to laugh. Tolwyn, confused, glanced up at him briefly. "Stand, Lady," he said cheerfully, and she did so. Her face had cuts and bruises on it from her helm, for the metal edges were sharp and it was heavy. Her golden-blond hair was greasy, matted, and dirty. Eldarion looked at her and stopped chuckling.  
"I know you are the daughter of King Eomer," he said, "yet I do not know your name. I am Eldarion, Prince of Gondor. Welcome to Minas Tirith." He held out his hand, waiting for her to shake it. She did not, only murmured, "I am Tolwyn." Eldarion tossed the helm he had been holding on the floor behind him. It clattered noisily, and the sound echoed through the room. "Why did you come here, Tolwyn?" He looked at her, trying to look at her eyes again. Tolwyn suddenly swooned and almost fainted. Every muscle in her was sore.

"Oh, oh. Come here; sit down. The journey must have been hard, especially for a girl." Tolwyn glared up at him. She was _not_ weak. She vowed to prove that someday. He took her hand and led her to where two chairs sat across from each other. He waited until she was seated, then he sat down in his own chair. He waited a few minute for her to recover her wits. She wiped the blood off the corner of her mouth, then continued to look at the ground, thinking.

"Why am I here?" she finally uttered hopelessly. "Because they would not suspect it…" she looked up at Eldarion. He sat with his elbow on his knee and his chin resting on his hand, looking at her earnestly. "Well, go on," he prompted. "I want to hear the whole story." Tolwyn sighed. She obviously didn't have any other option. "The only time Father was ever nice to me was my birthday a few days ago," she began. She explained about her lessons being over and her Meara and dagger being given to her. "Then in the evening, he asked me if I wanted to travel. I always have, so I told him yes, and he mentioned you… he said you needed a wife."

"_I_ need a _wife_?" he exclaimed. "That's preposterous! Although I do think Father is worried about an heir after me. He never told me it was _marriage_, though. But do go on with your side of the story." Tolwyn described perfectly how she had attempted suicide, how her brother found her just in time and suggested a different choice. "So I decided to ride east, to the one place they'd never suspect me to go to by my own will. I came upon a tavern, but forgot money… you know the rest."

"Well, that's certainly unusual. I knew nothing of a marriage, to tell the truth. I do know that Father was trying to negotiate something, he's always trying to these days. He thinks I need love." Tolwyn smiled a tiny bit, and replied, "That's exactly how I feel, although it's different for me. My father doesn't care about love for me; he just wants to get rid of me. I'm like a burden to be taken care of."

"I'm sure that's not it," said Eldarion, his voice actually unsure. He pitied Tolwyn. Neither of them wanted love or marriage, yet their fathers were forcing it on them. He quickly changed the subject. "Well, Lady Tolwyn, I promise not to tell anyone of your visit here… if you promise to go straight back to Edoras and reveal yourself to your father." Tolwyn said nothing for a moment. It really was her dream to be a fighter, a wild traveler; if she went back permanently, she would never get to. So she just looked back at him, never agreeing. "What about the barkeeper?" she asked. "I'm sorry that I ate all that, but it can't be given back, and I don't have any money at all."

"I have plenty to pay him, and more for his trouble. Don't worry about it." Tolwyn smiled. Her father was right- he was a gentleman. Eldarion saw her pretty smile, and grinned back. "So if we refuse to be married, can we still be friends?" Tolwyn nodded, and stood, her smile growing into a grin. Eldarion stood too, and held out his hand as before. Tolwyn shook it this time. "It was a pleasure to meet you, O Great Prince," she said jokingly, and he chuckled. "The pleasure is all mine, O Daughter of Kings." He picked up her helm and handed it to her, and she put it on as she had it before. He then looked around, and out the window. "You should leave, now. I will pay the barkeeper later. Tell no one of our meeting!"

"I won't say a word if you won't," she said, and after one last handshake and shared grin, she left. She made her way down through the streets, marveling at the architecture. She snuck out the gates again, and found Baldor where he was. By that time it was nearing night. She mounted Baldor and rode towards the setting sun. Eldarion had told her to reveal herself; but she had another plan.


	13. A New Plan

Tolwyn made her way back to Edoras along the same route she had come. She had enough energy from the food and rest she had gotten, but the journey was still rough. She wished often for a nice, hot bath and a comfortable bed. But she arrived at the gates of Edoras in the late evening on July 1st. She tied Baldor up outside the gate again, making sure he was where none of the guards could see him. She snuck through the gate unnoticed and crept to an alleyway.

Tolwyn made her way up the hill to where the Golden Hall was. She walked around in the shadows outside the side of it, and finally located her brother's bedroom window. There was no light showing from it. Tolwyn began to ascend the wall. She was slow, for it was very difficult. After about ten minutes she reached her brother's window and pulled herself onto the ledge. She didn't look, just rolled herself inside, afraid of falling out.

Elfwine, who was asleep, awoke to a loud THUMP and clattering on the floor of his room. He sat up, pulled off the sheets and stood. "Who's there?!" he murmured. Tolwyn could see him searching for a weapon as he spoke. She sat up as well as she could and looked straight at him. "Calm down, Elfwine, 'tis only me," she whispered. He stopped searching and instead lit a candle.  
"Tolwyn!" He exclaimed in a whisper, and kneeled by her. Her brother quickly pulled her into a tight hug. "Elfwine, I need your help! Let go of me," Tolwyn gasped breathlessly. Elfwine did so, and helped her to her feet. "Did you decide to come back?" he asked. Before she could respond he went on to say, "Father was in tears when he discovered you gone. I've only seen him cry one other time, and that was after Mother's funeral. He really does care about you."

Tolwyn sighed. She had already set her mind to traveling, and was not going to give up her dream now. This decision on her part was selfish, perhaps immature, but she did not know it at the time. All she knew was that she wished to be stronger. "Elfwine, sit with me. I have to tell you what happened." So they sat together on his bed, and she told him all of what she did in Minas Tirith. When she ended with her not agreeing to Eldarion's deal, she told him her plan.

"As long as Eldarion never finds out I kept my secret, he'll never tell it himself," she said. Elfwine, who had listened to this patiently, took off Tolwyn's helm. "You are scarred," he said softly, lovingly. "You are tired, bruised. Please, Tolwyn, just stay here… I don't want you hurt."

"And neither did Father!" Tolwyn hissed. "That is why he would have me traded, sent off! I _must_ leave, Elfwine. I am _not_ changing my mind." Elfwine sighed, and stood up. "You are prepared to be dirty and tired your whole life? Fine. It is your decision. But I have some things to give you first." Elfwine pulled on a shirt (for he had been sleeping shirtless, due to warm weather). He crept quietly out his door and down the hall, barefoot. Tolwyn sat and listened, and waited for him. He came back soon, hiding something behind his back.

"Close your eyes," he said. She could hear him walk to her and kneel in front of her. "Now, open them," he said, and when she did she gasped in surprise. In Elfwine's arms was a bow, long and wooden. It had simbelmyne blooms engraved in gold in the handle and at both ends of it. "I made it myself, over the year," said Elfwine, grinning. "I didn't make this, but it goes with the bow." With that he pulled a quiver full of arrows out of hiding and presented it to her. The quiver was one that had been passed down for generations of royal Eorlingas, and it had beautiful designs and a leather strap on it. The arrows had grey feathers on them, as did all Rohan arrows. The heads were a black metal, and the same shape as the heads of the spears the Riders had.

"Elfwine, I… don't know what to say," Tolwyn breathed. Along with swordsmanship and riding he had taught her how to shoot arrows, and she had become fair enough at it. She was even a little disappointed when she had no bow the night she ran away. "Thank you!" She exclaimed quietly, and hugged her brother's neck. "I shall use them well, and think of you whenever I do." She stored them in a safe place until she left.

Tolwyn planned on leaving again, that very night. But first she needed what she had forgotten the first time. Food, and drink, and money for when she needed it. This required a lot of sneaking around the hallways on Elfwine's part. He snuck to the kitchen and got apples, bread, and a water-flask, and made three trips doing so. Tolwyn also thought of other things she would need. Healing herbs and strips of cloth, which a trip to the healing room took care of; some hunting knives, a bowl, a spoon, a small cooking-pot, which Elfwine made another trip to the kitchen for; Tolwyn even had him sneak to her room, to get a blanket and some other things.

"What are these?" he asked, as he gave her a brown paper package tied up with string and a small leather-bound book. "This," said Tolwyn, holding up the package, "Is Aunt Eowyn's dress. I decided to keep it safe and hidden, so they think I ran away in it. And this," she said, holding up the book, "Is a journal that I have kept since I learned how to write." Elfwine also supplied her with a folded map of Middle-Earth and money from his own account, and plenty of money. "You never know when you'll need it," he said, putting it all into a small leather pouch. He also found a tinderbox so Tolwyn could start fires, and a big pack for her to put all her belongings in.

Since the guards, and the innkeeper, and many others in Minas Tirith had seen her, she decided to get a new disguise. She also needed a story; she couldn't just use her aunt's alias anymore. So she talked with Elfwine about it. After a while, they thought of a common name and a story. Tolwyn was now Dernwine, a stable boy from Edoras that had run away because the master of the stable beat him. It was a good story, one Tolwyn could elaborate on well.

They also chose a new disguise for her. Her father's unused breastplate and helm from the War of the Ring were her new armor, along with a plain chainmail shirt. Elfwine told her where all these things were located in the armory, and she planned to get them when she left.

Then, Elfwine made Tolwyn sit down, and he began to talk. "If you're going to live in the wilderness, I have to tell you how. I can't just let you die out there." He then proceeded to tell Tolwyn everything he knew about traveling. He paced back and forth in front of her as he did, stopping to think once in a while. He told her how to build fires, how to hunt and fish, how to pace herself and her horse so they would endure the whole day and not run out of energy.

"If you want to wash yourself, you simply jump in the nearest lake or creek," he said. "But remember to take your armor off… it rusts, you know." He told her how exactly to sleep at night, using her blanket as both a ground cover and as a cover for her. "What if it starts to rain?" Tolwyn inquired. "Then go to the nearest inn," said Elfwine, after thinking for a second. "And what if I'm not near an inn?" Tolwyn asked again. "Then start going towards one… or, build a shelter, though I don't know how you would do that."

Elfwine told her about other small things, little details involving daily life in the wild. "Don't forget to clean your weapons. Stay near civilization, just in case. Travel with groups of other people if you can. If you run out of money or supplies, come back here, and I'll give you some." Elfwine was about to say something else, but he stopped his pacing and looked at Tolwyn. She was crying, silently and slowly.

"What is it? Have you changed your mind? Will you stay?" Elfwine asked eagerly. He held out a hand to her and helped her stand. "I won't be coming back… I'm not just going to live in the wilderness, Elfwine. I'm going to fight. I'm going to go into battle with other braver souls, help to rid Middle-Earth of evil. I might never return." Elfwine let a tear fall down his cheek. "You are always welcome here, sister, you know that," he said, his voice breaking. "I hate to see you leave, but I can't stop you. I will miss you… "

Tolwyn hugged her brother tight. All her tears had been cried, even though of all times to come they should have come then. Her brother was the one person alive in the world that had ever cared for her. Even now he was doing the hardest thing in his life, letting her go. Elfwine pulled her tighter to him, relishing the feel of her slender body against his. She was right, it was likely she wouldn't survive her first year out there. But he wasn't going to tell her that.

"You've done so much for me," Tolwyn whispered in his ear. "Thank you for everything. I love you, brother." Elfwine let out a sob and started crying in earnest. Tolwyn sighed and let him hold her. It was nearing the early hours of the morning, and she had to be gone by sunrise, or she would be caught. She could already see the east sky out his window turning grey.

Elfwine stopped crying after a few minutes, but still held Tolwyn. "I love you too, and always will, he whispered back into her ear. He pulled away, and looked at her. She smiled sweetly up at him as he wiped away his tears. Elfwine took a step towards her, and held her chin in his hands. "You should be going now, don't let me stop you." With that he kissed her brow, a sign of a final goodbye. "I will miss you, Elfwine," Tolwyn whispered. "Farewell."

"Farewell, baby sister," Elfwine whispered back, and watched her as she turned away. She began the difficult climb back down the side of the Golden Hall, and after falling five feet, got up and ran to the armory. She took the designated armor and donned it, and made her way outside the gates again. She mounted Baldor after a few unsuccessful tries, and began to ride east. She came to the top of a hill, and looked back. The sleepy population of Edoras was just beginning to wake, and the Golden Hall gleamed in the rising sun. She filled her mind with the sight of her home, cherishing the memory. Then she turned away in tears, yelled at Baldor, and rode to the rising sun.


	14. Consequences of Freedom

Eomer realized his neglect and mistake after he found out Tolwyn ran away, and immediately regretted every mean thing he had ever done to her. He _had_ indeed loved her, but had not understood just how much until she was gone. He sent out every available Rider of Rohan there was in search of her, and some still roam Middle-Earth today looking for her.

The people of Edoras, indeed all of Rohan, mourned at her loss. She was never mean to them, and in the year before she left, when she had been walking among them, she got to know some of them very well.

Elfwine received a letter two years back, when Tolwyn would have been eighteen years old. Its message was this:

_Dearest brother, it has been three years since I left you. The time has passed quickly. I have done as you said and traveled with other people as often as possible, and I have been rewarded greatly with experiences beyond my wildest expectations. I have fought many, many battles, too many to count. I am scarred deeply, but stronger. I continue to grow stronger every day. _

_I have grown other ways too. I can wield a sword better than you now, probably. I have made a great many friends, though none of them know my true identity. Baldor obeys my every whim now, and no longer has the temper he had when I first received him._

_I still remain slender, but I've grown taller. I believe I'm your height now. My hair has gotten browner (most likely because it is under my helmet) but my eyes remain the same. My alias still works, for I look just like a gangly, awkward young man that is still too skinny. _

_At the moment, while I write this, I am sitting at an inn in Bree. The men stared at me when I came in. They wonder what a boy as young as me is doing in an inn far from home. I say, let them wonder. They can always ask, but men are such cowards. _

_Now, my clothes, as far as the green tunic and black pants, are worn but still usable. The leather boots and belt, and Father's armor, also are in good shape. The sword and bow I care for well, and I try to retrieve every arrow I shoot._

_All in all, Elfwine, I have adjusted well to this life. It is dirty and painful and hard, but I feel so independent and free. Sometimes, though, when I know I am all alone, I take off my helmet. Sometimes under the same circumstances I begin to sing to song of Eorl. But I love watching the stars at night, and watching the sunrise in the morning. I love the feel of the wind on my face when I gallop through fields with Baldor. I love the feel of battle, of my sword connecting with flesh, of the mixture of sweat and dirt and blood that runs down my face. I've killed many enemies, and please don't think me bad for this, but I rather enjoy it. _

_I continue to miss you and Father every day, and often dream about home. Perhaps someday I will return. But until then, I continue to love you, brother. _

_Yours always, Tolwyn_

Tolwyn, now a grown woman of twenty-one years, is very alive and healthy, but hidden. No one knows where she is or what she is doing. Most everyone believes Tolwyn is dead by now. Some say she ran off and married a charming lad. Some say she died in battle, after revealing her identity one last time. But King Eomer believes she is still alive, and some consider him crazy for still searching for her. She has no intention of returning to her home soon, but her intentions may change with time. But the daughter of Eomer continues to fight disguised and live the life of an outcast.


	15. everything else

Author notes and references, copyrights, dedication, parallels to the author.

All places and characters except Tolwyn copyrighted to Tolkien and the Saul Zaentz company.

First printed May 22, 2004. (Finished May 21st around midnight)

Dedicated to all those at chatroom who helped me develop my character, especially Melty and Mattheapar… love you guys :-)

(First Chapter) Return of the King, Appendix A, II (The House of Eorl): "In the last year of the Third Age he Eomer wedded Lothiriel, daughter of Imrahil. Their son Elfwine the Fair ruled after him." same place "For though Sauron had passed, the hatreds and evils that he bred had not died…"

(Seventh Chapter) The Two Towers, book three, King of the Golden Hall. The 'Song of Eorl' is this:

"Where now the horse and the Rider?

Where is the horn that was blowing?

Where is the helm and the hauberk,

And the bright hair flowing?

Where is the hand on the harpstring,

And the red fire glowing?

They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow;

The days have gone down in the West, behind the hills into shadow.

Who shall gather the smoke of the dead wood burning,

Or behold the flowing years from the Sea returning?"

Parallels to my life…

I have the same color eyes and hair :-)

Her birthday is exactly one month and one week after mine.

The part where she's 5 and her brother leaves… I was 5 years old when my own little sister was born.

Her schooling from 8 years old onward, I left public school when I was that age and began homeschooling. (I left after I turned 11 but that's not a parallel.)

The winter she was ten, she lost her mother. The winter I was ten, I hit puberty.

I read Lord of the Rings when I was 13, she began sneaking out at nights when she was 13. Also, I stumbled in chatroom in late winter at the same age.

Her 14th birthday was the beginning of new lessons. My 14th birthday was the beginning of high school. High school was way different in the arrangement and flexibility of classes, so to me it was very much "new lessons".

I have necklace, gold and green, that my grandmother gave me. There's no diamond horse but still, it is close to Tolwyn's mother's necklace.

Over the course of my own freshman year I grew into a Lady myself. I became less shy, got my permit and learned to drive, became happier and made many friends.

I had a goal of finishing the story on my 15th birthday and met it well enough (a few days after). I had a party for my birthday, and though I never got a horse or sword it was still wonderful ;-) Right after my birthday (the very next day in fact) I traveled different places. And now as I go through the next three years I bet I will grow in knowledge and skill, have many adventures and such, just as my character did.


End file.
